My recent re-involvement in programming has really bolstered my patience. I think that programming really teaches a lot about what it would be like to be a parent, and that due to it, I'll be a good one, some day.

Take this, for example: My child burns his fingers on the stove, while messing around. I think that every parent pretty much has to go through this. So, enter my programming knowledge.

The child burned his fingers, so the first thing I would do would be to equip him with a pair of oven mitts.

Hrm, now the child has burned his face. It's odd that the error would move around like that, after I fixed what I thought it would affect... Ok, lets try it with the left oven mitt removed.

The child now burns his left hand! What?! Okay, maybe it's a fluke, lets try it with the left one on, but the right one off.

The child burns his right hand... this is odd. It seems like the error occurs on the hands first, but if they're fixed, it moves to the face. I'll try again with the oven mitts.

Child burns his face again. Odd, but predictable. I think I should look over his heat-sensing code, but first lets try using a catcher's mask to prevent the face burn.

Child manages to burn his elbow, now! What kind of error is this. I'll have to decommission him until I figure out the issue. I'll just comment out the "touching new things" and "learning" code for now, and replace them with an always true line of code.

Huh.. now the child seems to be having seizures....

Thus, I would be a great parent.

Er, no? Not a great parent?

What? DYFS?